i am quite possibly the worst human being ever.
why cant i ever just be happy with what i have???
but nooo i have to go be jealous and catty. then pretend im hurting from it.
but in truth i am hurting. its hurts being me.
im actually like pretty positive im gay...because the thought of kissing my boyfriend REPULSES ME.
yea poor him.
he aint getting squat haha.
i really hate my life.
i hate that im gay/bi (whats the fucking difference?!? ILIKEGIRLS.) i hate that i always want more. i hate that by wanting more i pushed her even farther away towards that stupid whore girlfriend she has.
and i hate that she has so much effect on me. i hate that i love her. i hate that shes adorable. i hate that shes funny. i hate that shes sweet. i hate hate hate hate hate that she has a girlfriend that isnt me. but i hate myself because i dont want her to be with me. it would hurt too much because we're so far away. i hate that i dont want her to hurt. i hate myself because i dont want her to hurt. i hate that i keep doing this whole "if i cant have you no one can" evil villan thing.
i just want to crawl inside a shell and live peacefully without humans for the rest of my life.
IHATEMEANDMYLIFEANDEVERYTHINGABOUTME!
2 comments:
I don't think you should hate yourself. Kudos to you for realizing who you might truly be. I hope things work out the best for you, good luck.
thank you
it means a lot that someone i dont even know cares =]
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